Mom Guilt

Mom guilt. We've all suffered from it at one time or another. So I spent a lot of time thinking about it. And here's what I've come up with - this parenting thing is a learning process. Just because you became a parent - you did not become an expert. As humans, we continue to learn and grow until we die. So please move on from whatever is weighing you down and start fresh. Don't hang on to that guilt. I've decided that we can only do the best with what we know. If you made a decision and you just did your best-  and each day there's a different scale for what is your best. Sometimes you're tired and you just say something to your kid that makes you cringe, but as long as you thought it through and you did the best with what you knew at the time, you have no reason for guilt.

I'm going to give you a couple examples to help you work through some guilt if you're holding on to it. I'm going to call my mom out here!

I really slather my kids with sunblock. My kids go to a summer day camp every day and they're playing outside for most of the summer day.

My mom said to me one day, "You know, when you were growing up you and your sister never wore sunblock and I really feel guilty about that now."

The first thing I said to her was, "If I have skin problems It's not going to be because you didn't put sunblock on me as a kid. It's going to be because when I was a teenager I was going to the tanning bed all the time." (This may or may not be true, but I feel like that is going to come back to me at some point or another.)

Then I said to her, "Back in those days the research wasn't out about the harmful effects of the sun. You did the best with what you knew."

Some days are better than others. This whole parenting thing is a learning process. If you made a decision you're not proud of - tomorrow you'll do better. Children are unpredictable. So sometimes we make quick decisions and then we feel bad about it later. I'm asking you to feel bad about it for about five minutes, then forgive yourself, move on and have a better day tomorrow.